Since we’re all supposed to keep our distance from each
other, I want to recommend a book by Anthony Storr: The title hit me: Solitude: A Return to the Self. Wow! You need to be alone to gain a real sense of who you
are? Interesting idea.
The fact is that we often have a wobbly sense of who we
are. Human identity is fragile and
necessarily elastic. It’s so easy
to lose the thread of yourself with others when they ignore, criticize,
belittle, project, exaggerate, or misunderstand you. Sometimes you have to pull back and look upon the world—and yourself—with
a cold eye.
Storr argues we can never fully rely on others for
self-affirmation even when they
affirm us. We have to forge our own identity.
He examines situations where the solitude is forced on us. Thanks
to the pandemic, we know what that feels like. Storr writes about being alone in prison. There are many
examples in history of incarcerated men and women who gained spiritual
illumination or were inspired to write great letters, pamphlets, and books
while alone in prison. The main point:
in solitude we’re more likely to discover who we really are at the deepest
levels of our being. I guess it
depends on what experiences you have.
Anybody?
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